Just needed a reminder that I’ve got a worth that’s more than what the world is trying to tell me lately. It does me good to post things like that.
(Not trying to sound emo with that! I type that whilst smiling. It’s just how it is.)
Hope this does you guys some good, too. You’re loved so much, it’s ridiculous.
I feel like, I would like
To be somewhere else doing something that matters
And I’ll admit here, while I sit here
My mind wastes away and my doubts start to gather
Whats the purpose? It feels worthless
So unwanted like I’ve lost all my value
I can’t find it, not in the least bit
and I’m just scared, so scared that I’ll fail you
And sometimes I think that I’m not any good at all
And sometimes I wonder why, why I’m even here at all
But then you assure me
I’m a little more than useless
And when I think that I can’t do this
You promise me that I’ll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
So I say if I can’t, do something significant
I’ll opt to leave most opportunities wasted
And nothing trivial, that life could give me will
Measure up to what might have replaced it
Too late look, my date book
Is packed full of days that were empty and now gone
And I bet, that regret
Will prove to get me to improve in the long run
And sometimes I think that I’m not any good at all
And sometimes I wonder why, why I’m even here at all
But then you assure me
I’m a little more than useless
And when I think that I can’t do this
You promise me that I’ll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
I’m a little more than useless
And I never knew I knew this
Was gonna the day, gonna be the day
That I would do something right
Do something right for once
I notice, I know this
Week is a symbol of how I use my time
Resent it, I spent it
Convincing myself the world’s doing just fine
Without me
Doing anything of any consequence
Without me
Showing any sign of ever making sense
Of my time , it’s my life
And my right, to use it like I should
Like he would, for the good
Of everything that I would ever know
I’m a little more than useless
When I think that I can’t do this
You promise me that I’ll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
I’m a little more than useless
And I never knew I knew this
Was gonna the day, gonna be the day
That I would do something right
Do something right for once
I found myself in the prayer room again, the next day, and picked up a book whose title I don’t remember. It was about the gospel. And written by a pastor. Anywho. I came across this 4-step process to survive an anaconda attack from a peace corps maunal:
1. Don’t run.
2. Lie down.
3. Remain still…
I don’t mean to subtract from the awesomeness and validity of the analogy, but can I just say that the idea of LETTING A SNAKE SWALLOW YOU FEET FIRST UNTIL YOUR HANDS ARE ABLE TO SLICE ITS SPINAL CORD is probably the most terrifying thing for me ever?
“Cats and rabbits would reside in fancy little houses and be dressed in shoes and hats and trousers…in a world of my own.”
My nose honked. It felt like the end of my nose was vibrating mid-honk.
My night has been made.
MLIA.